How to Have a Sexy Menopause

Canadian women have some of the highest life expectancies in the world with an average of 82 years, which means a lot of us are still happy, healthy, and enjoying sex long after menopause. With the average age of menopause landing somewhere around 52 years old, that’s a lot of orgasms still to be had!

Although the media may tell us otherwise, menopause doesn’t mean you are suddenly not sexy or sexual. It can just mean you may have to go about seeking pleasure a little differently. After all, hormone changes and age do bring about changes in the body and the libido. That’s why our experts at Naughty North have put together this great list of suggestions on how tackle some common changes that come with menopause and how to keep that fire lit either solo or with your partner.

Alu Water Based Aloe Vera Lubricant by Dame

VAGINAL DRYNESS & LACK OF NATURAL LUBRICATION

As estrogen production decreases, so does the ability to create natural vaginal lubrication, which can lead to dryness. This is a very common complaint. Here are some of our tips

• Use lubricant every time you masturbate or have sex with a partner so you don’t have to rely only on what you can product naturally. Look for thicker lubes or ones that are pH balanced and gentle.
• Masturbate! If penetration is uncomfortable, try to have orgasms through clitoral stimulation alone. This will increase the blood flow to the vagina
• Use a lubricant daily to help you feel more comfortable
• Consult a doctor if you are finding that nothing seems to be working for you.

Naughty North Recommends

Alu Water Based Aloe Vera Lubricant by Dame

Slippery Stuff Water Based Gel Lubricant

Satisfyer Pro 2 Air Pulsation Clitoral Stimulator

Inspire Silicone Vaginal Dilators Kit

VAGINAL TIGHTNESS AND DISCOMFORT DURING PENETRATION

As we age and estrogen decreases, the vaginal walls can lose their elasticity as well. That’s where discomfort during intercourse often comes from. Of course, there are more extreme examples and if you feel you fit into that category, please consult a doctor or a pelvic floor specialist who can help you out.

• Use lots of thick, cushioned lubricants during partnered or solo sex
• Masturbate using external stimulation of the clitoris to get the blood flowing throughout your vagina and pelvis
• Try a vaginal dilator set to help loosen up your muscles
• Forego using hard, inflexible vibrators internally and opt for softer, smaller, flexible models

Naughty North Recommends

Inspire Silicone Vaginal Dilators Kit

Sensuva Unscented Hybrid Silicone/Water Formula Personal Lubricant

Iroha Rin Kogane Waterproof Silicone Vibrator

LELO Luna Beads Kegel Exerciser Set

URINARY INCONTINENCE (PEEING OR DRIBBLING)

If you find yourself peeing a bit when you sneeze or pee, rest assured this is completely normal. Although not just a menopausal issue, the pelvic floor certainly weakens as we age, and this decreases our ability to clench those muscles like we used to. Here are some of our best tips:

• Have lot of orgasms. This involuntary contracting of the pelvic floor muscles is great exercise as well as just plain amazing.
• Strengthen your pelvic floor with Kegel exercises. A strong pelvic floor helps not only with urinary problems but with vaginal discomfort and can make your orgasms more powerful. Luckily, Kegel balls come in many shapes and sizes including ones that vibrate, helping to draw much needed blood flow to the pelvic region.

Naughty North Recommends

LELO Luna Beads Kegel Exerciser Set

Rechargeable Kegel Ball for Beginners

Magic Wand Power Rechargeable Cordless Vibrator

DECREASED LIBIDO AND DESIRE FOR SEX

This is very common in women at menopause and there can be several underlying factors. Hormonal changes do play a part but so can stress and any number of the other factors we are talking about here, which can affect your self esteem and body image. Again, if you are concerned, please consult your doctor. Here are some tips our experts recommend to help get you in the groove.  

• More foreplay can help you get to a point where you are able to relax and enjoy yourself. Try massage candles or oils with your partner
• Masturbate or have partnered sex without orgasm as a goal. Try using an external vibrator all over your body – your skin, nipples, etc. – to awaken desire
• Try using a clitoral stimulation cream to enhance your body’s natural arousal. These often create heightened sensation that can give us that boos we need.

Naughty North Recommends

Magic Wand Power Rechargeable Cordless Vibrator

Earthly Body Hemp Seed Massage Candle - Lavender

On Arousal Oil Original by Sensuva

Liberator Wedge and Ramp Combo Sex Positioning Cushion

STIFF AND SORE MUSCLES, BACK PAIN AND JOINT PAIN

As we get older, our bodies change as well and suddenly the positions we used to enjoy during sex can become uncomfortable and challenging. There is a large selection of cushions, straps, and bolsters on the market that can help by supporting your back, hips, neck, or anywhere else that challenges you. Here are some of our favourites:

I Like It Doggie Style Sex Position Strap and Support

Liberator Wedge 24 Inch Sex Positioning Cushion

Liberator Wedge and Ramp Combo Sex Positioning Cushion